giant quotie bug attacks Michigan

A giant quotie bug was spotted on the Portage Lake Ship Canal in Houghton/Hancock Michigan yesterday afternoon. Holy shit, eh?!?! Quotie bugs can cause tremendous damage to the environment - much of what lays in its path can be turned into discourse with the mere movement of the bug's pincers and utterances from its mouth. Bystanders reported hearing the bug mumbling something about "action fabrics" and becoming incensed over two- and four-way stretch materials. Luckily the vertical lift bridge over the Keweenaw Waterway tangled the quotie bug's antennae - trapping the bug until authorities could exterminate the pest.