It's the End of an Era: Lavar Burton Leaves Reading Rainbow

So, one of my favorite Halloween memories - and quite arguably one of the most magical moments of my life - is from my senior year in high school. My friend Lorna and I decided to go trick-or-treating despite our advanced age. We chose a relatively upscale neighborhood in the San Fernando Valley, reasoning the quality of the treats would reflect the socioeconomic status of the neighborhood's inhabitants. We also decided to wear the dumbest costumes ever: I wore an orange, red, and yellow top I knit myself that made me look kind of like a slutty lifesaver and Lorna wore an afro wig. What can I say? We were pretty stupid (I blame it on peer pressure). After an hour or so of nasty comments about how we were too old to be trick-or-treating we rang the bell to a house and Lavar Burton wearing a pirate costume answered the door - I couldn't believe it. After he "yarred" at us in his best pirate accent, I shrieked, "oh my god! I love Reading Rainbow" and then began to sing the Reading Rainbow theme song (you know: "butterfly in the sky, I can go twice as high, take a look, it's in a book"... etc.). And you know what? He started singing with me.

That, my friends, is class.

After producing and hosting the show for twenty years, Burton has announced he is leaving Reading Rainbow because a lame eductional services company (the same people who own Sylvan Learning Center and Hooked on Phonics) bought production rights for the show. Read more here about how awesome Burton is for not selling out and how reading has inspired him throughout his life.

Southern Indiana Odyssey

Just returned from an overnight in Southern Indiana with Terra to meet her two-week-old niece, Priscilla. Babies that young are pretty cool: they pretty much just sleep and occasionally make really funny noises (she wet-bunted on Terra and me at least five times while we were there! I know it sounds gross but it is pretty hilarious to have a seven-pound glowworm bunt on you while you're holding it). Granted, she doesn't do as much as my Nintendog (even when I tried to prompt her with my stylus), but she was really warm and sweet.
The trip was also pretty cool because I bought a game for my DS that finally convinced Terra they are actually fun to play with (thank you Bust-A-Move and your bubble-puzzle fun for convincing one of the last holdouts! on a related note, I've definitely developed "DS elbow") Not cool about Southern Indiana? The shit-disturbers in the neighborhood even go out in incredibly cold temperatures: my car got egged! WTF?

I've sunk to a new low...

So my large blog readership (hi Dad) has probably been wondering why I haven't been posting a lot lately. I'd like to say it's because, now that I'm home from vacation, I've really thrown myself into my studies. Nope. Today, the class I'm auditing got cancelled at the last minute (eeps - no matter that I woke up early to do the 160 pages of reading for it) so I finally got to return to the magical kingdom that is Animal Crossing: Wild World. What can I say? Many of my friends are starting to worry about my obsession with it - threatening violence if I mention once more what Lobo the wolf said to me about the way I smell or my thoughts on why more men should wear onesies.

Today I sunk to a pretty new low though - I actually started looking up cheats for the game. What can I say? I'm having a hard time catching bugs (it's winter and I refuse to use the time travel cheat) and I was looking for advice. Lucky the mummy dog wanted to have a bug competition with me, and I felt inadequate. The cheats-site made me realize there are two kinds of cheats: the cheats for people who really love the game and the cheats for people who just want to make fast money. I refuse to be interested in the latter... at least for now (hey, I'm anxious for my Nookway to turn into a Nookingtons, but I'm going to try to be patient).

The cheats for people who love the game totally crack me up - I can totally change my town tune to "Wake Me Up When September Ends" by Green Day if I wanted to (narf! Instead, I changed it to "Smoke on the Water" by Deep Purple, thanks to Pug Gurl). Some of these so-called cheats just crack me up. Like dogstar 13, who clearly possesses a fetish for bureaucracy:

See The Mayor on a normal day!
Want to see Tortimer the Mayor on a day when he isn't walking outside? Then go to the Town Hall, and talk to Pelly at the green window. When the camera zooms down to a close up, you'll be able to see a familiar figure working in the background!

What a weirdo! I mean, Tortimer the Mayor isn't even cute!

Insomnia...

Since I've been back home I've been having a lot of trouble sleeping (and no, not because I've been too busy playing on my DS to schedule sleep time). It seems that every other or every third night I am either entirely capable of falling asleep for more than an hour or so at a time or else my sleep quality is so poor I don't seem to be getting all the stage 4 or "delta sleep" that I need. Needless to say, lack of sleep makes me feel like a walking idiot zombie. If you're having trouble sleeping, you may consider frightening yourself by reading wikipedia's entry on insomnia - it could convince you that you're suffering from hypomania or at least that you practice poor sleep hygiene (yes, there is such a thing).

Apparently, Even Pandas Have Standards

Male panda gets too fat for sex, keepers say
Female Lin Hui ‘no longer comfortable’ mating with obese Chuang Chuang

By Sutin Wannabovorn BANGKOK, Thailand -

Chuang Chuang the Panda is just too heavy to have sex. Thai authorities have put him on a strict diet as part of a long-running campaign to get him to mate with female partner Lin Hui at the Chiang Mai Zoo in northern Thailand. “Chuang Chuang is gaining weight too fast and we found Lin Hui is no longer comfortable with having sex with him,” said the zoo’s chief veterinarian, Kanika Limtrakul, adding that Chuang Chuang weighed 331 pounds while Lin Hui is only 253 pounds. As a result, zoo authorities are cutting out bamboo shoots in the daily meal for Chuang Chuang and giving the obese bear only bamboo leaves, Kanika said. The diet plan is the latest in an unsuccessful and often strange campaign by zoo officials to get the two bears to mate. They have held a mock wedding, announced plans to separate the two to spark a little romance and even talked of introducing panda porn — videos of other pandas mating — to get the pair in the mood. There are as few as 1,600 giant pandas in the mountain forests of central China, according to the zoo. An additional 120 are in Chinese breeding facilities and zoos, and about 20 live in zoos outside China. Pandas are threatened by loss of habitat, poaching and a low reproduction rate. Females in the wild normally have a cub once every two to three years.

----- Thanks to E.Z. for forwarding me the article, because when she saw "panda porn" she thought of me. It's nice to be reminded that at moments, your friends really do get you.

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I know I'm related to chimpanzees... Proof of Evolution!

As you can see in the images below (just to clear up any confusion - I'm pictured on the left, whereas the chimpanzee is pictured on the right) - when faced with scrambling over rough terrain, humans reject a bipedal stance and assume the quadrupedal stance characteristic of their evolutionary relative, the chimpanzee. Comparison shots of me and chimps poo-flinging and cigarette-smoking are forthcoming.

Leo Carillo Tide Pools

I visited my favorite beach, Leo Carillo, today during its low tide at sunset. In the largest pool I saw two hermit crabs, and several starfish bunched up together, or "spooning" as some tide poolers call it. I also put my finger on the creature pictured in the lower right image - I think it's some kind of sea urchin. It was really smushy and it bunched up into itself when I put my finger on it. Afterwards I was convinced my fingertip felt tingly, but I think I was just imagining it. If anyone can identify the name for the sea friend I made today, I will send you a check for $3.

Scenic Polaroids

I've been taking a lot of Polaroids on my trip but I have wanted to focus on subjects that seem unlikely for the genre of the Polaroid (typical of the genre? head shots and children crawling on Santa Claus). Also, I've been taking series of the same subject to view them together. Working with a Polaroid camera has been challenging since I'm accustomed to using a digital camera - acquainting myself with distance and lighting requirements has certainly led to some wasted film. Below is a digital image of three pictures I took of a stretch of beach off the PCH (between Zuma and El Matador).

What did people do before digital cameras when they wanted to take subversive or illegal images? They took polaroids. There is something about the autonomy in processing that is really empowering and conducive for subversion. There is also something about their singularity and lack of reproducibility that makes me a little awed and wistful.

Merry Armenian Christmas... NBA Player Hater Saturday: Tony Parker Makes Me Want to Narf

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Back on the Grid... Happy New Year